Anger is a normal and sometimes useful emotion. But when it is the overflow of a heart gripped by unfulfilled desires, disappointment, bitterness, and unforgiveness, we must see it the way God sees it—only as sinful behavior.
When we choose to walk by the Spirit in our marriages, we will not gratify the desires of the flesh. The desires of the Spirit are against the desires of the flesh. They are opposed to each other.
Scripture tells us if we are going to win the battle between what our flesh wants and what the Spirit desires to do in us, then we need to lean in and figure out how to allow this Warrior to own our hearts.
It is only through the work of the Spirit living in us that we are able to realize a sustained change in our behavior. When we yield to the Spirit, we see responses that are gentle and patient, that are kind and loving, that are forgiving and full of grace.
If the very same Spirit who raised Jesus from the dead lives inside of me, why do I continue to struggle? If the very thing that defines love, joy, and peace lives inside of me, why do I continue to live with heartache and with conflict in my marriage?
When we quench the Spirit in our marriage, He gets quieter and quieter, and we suddenly find ourselves out in the wilderness, wondering how we got there. There are signposts along the way, my friends. Pay attention.
It’s in the pain that God will meet you and draw you close because it’s in the pain that your heart will be exposed. It’s only in your deepest, darkest, most difficult moments that you will discover what’s most important to you.
If you want to breathe life back into your marriage, take some time alone with God today and ask Him to reveal where you have fallen short of His glory, where you need to confess your sin. Lay it down and let Him break you over it, then leave it at His feet.
It is the work of the Spirit that increases our gentleness and our patience, that allows us to think of the others needs before our own, that prompts us to serve the other person.